It’s hard to have your baby in the nicu
It’s hard to not be able to visit him whenever you want. ( we go family style for his 6pm style and since i was just released from hospital and in a lot of pain from the c-section I have agreed not to take a cab until I am healed)
It’s hard to be so clueless about the care of your own child.

I know it is for the best because they are giving him care I can not.

And I am trying to keep it together for my daughter and my husband because they really need me.

But sometimes it’s hard.

Today it was hard.
I was hoping to return to work in about a week. So I can bank my time and have 10wks with Jimmy when he comes home.
Today my doctor told me she would rather I waited 2or3 more weeks.
That made me very sad.
I will survive. I am just sad.